his eye on the sparrow

It all started with I took my eyes off of Christ and put it on myself, things started to happen to me that never happen before. My mind started to be filled with thoughts of this world and doning things that are not about christ. My feeling started to take contorl and rule me, I get sad more than before, Depression start to creep up on me. I cry sometimes when i feel alone and no one cares. I start to put other things first. Prayer life is being drain. (this is the first thing that stop. when i stop praying, i start to getting weak that i begin walking away from the Lord). Some time i dislike myself because of stuff that happen. I feel look down, because i'm not like everyone. I compare my self to other people and so on... But all because i to my eyes off of Christ and put it on my self, and because of that i walk a road of darkness, moving alway from the light. But the story is not over, I pick up my bible and read about the son who ran from his father into an unknown place of sin and darkness, But it was there when he came to his senses, knowing that at hes fathers house there was food a bed to sleep and alot of love. Where he got back home the father run to him because thats hes son. After reading that i started to cry because i thought that Christ was done with me because i stop praying like i did before and started thinking about other stuff and putting other thing before him. But He wasnt. God wanted me to come back, He was standing there the whole time but i was the one that walk away from him. I repented with a broken heart turning back to the Lord, Clinging on to him for dear life. not wanted to turn my back on him ever again. Thank you Lord... I never want to drain your time, but i want to "Milk it all until i cant take it no more" The song God gave me is " HIS EYE IS ON THE SPARROW"